Parenting in Paris: My teenager is currently a junior at an international high school in Paris, juggling exams for various programs in the US, UK, Canada, and France. Our home is inundated with test-related letters from SAT to DELE, BAC, and IGCSE, each significant in its own country. It can seem quite overwhelming. Parenting in Paris offers a unique blend of cultural experiences and traditional challenges for families living in the city.
While the official aspects come with clear guidelines, deadlines, and support from guidance counselors, the real challenge lies in navigating the complexities of raising a teen in a foreign country. Unlike standardized testing, there is no handbook for managing this experience. Navigating the educational system is a significant aspect of parenting in Paris, with numerous international and French schools to choose from.
Travel is one of the perks of raising a teen abroad. For instance, my daughter recently mentioned she would be visiting three countries within a week. Her class took day trips to the EU headquarters in Brussels and to Madrid, benefiting from the ease of travel within Europe. Paris’s multicultural environment further enriches the experience, as diverse households are common. My daughter’s friend, Clara, for example, is raised by a Moroccan mother and an English father in Paris. Even at my daughter’s public school, located in a traditionally French-Catholic area, many students are bilingual. As the French say, c’est normal!
However, there are less favorable aspects to consider. Smoking, or tabagism, is a significant concern; over 30% of French teens smoke, with most starting before age 15, despite the legal age for purchasing cigarettes being 18. If your teen is tempted, it’s a challenge to prevent them from smoking.
In Paris, teens are legally allowed to visit bars at 18, but they often begin drinking at home with their families before then. French teens are less likely to engage in excessive drinking compared to their American counterparts. My older daughter, now studying in the US, notes this cultural difference. “Mom,” she said while enjoying a Bordeaux, “it’s not a problem to get embarrassingly drunk, but having a nice glass of wine with a meal is almost impossible until I’m 21!”
Driving restrictions also contribute to this difference. In France, teens can’t drive alone until they’re 18, unlike in California, where 16-year-olds can drive with a learner’s permit. Public transportation is so convenient and parking so difficult that many young adults find it easier to use rideshare services instead. One of the joys of parenting in Paris is the abundance of parks and recreational areas where families can enjoy outdoor activities.
Parenting in Paris : Cultural Differences and Common Challenges
A notable concern for me is whether my daughter is responsible during unsupervised holidays with her friends. In France, it’s quite common for 16-year-olds to travel alone. When my daughter first requested an unsupervised trip, I was surprised that other parents were okay with it. To my astonishment, a French news station was even featuring a story about teens planning independent trips.
The school assumed that high school juniors would naturally be organizing solo vacations. My daughter was thrilled to go, though it led to a few grey hairs on my part as she enjoyed her first taste of independence in London. Parenting in Paris means adapting to local customs and parenting styles that may differ from those in other countries.
In my daughter’s pediatrician’s office, there’s a cartoon showing a grumpy teenager in various moods. This cartoon captures the essence of teenage experience, demonstrating that despite cultural differences, the challenges of parenting teens are universally similar. We love them dearly, even if we sometimes feel like pulling our hair out. Managing extracurricular activities is a key part of parenting in Paris, as the city offers a wide range of options from art classes to sports.
